How Do I Hate Glee?

Let me count the ways.

For starters, Glee is what I would call a saccharine snorefest. Totally boring and way out of it's league (if there ever was a league for embarrassing TV shows in history). Glee just tries too much but comes short in so many different ways.Why do I say it's a snorefest? It's a TV show to avoid at all costs; a weekly dose of bad- perhaps even terrible programming. 

Glee Sucks!

Given the fact that everybody loves Glee, I expect it to be a good laugh. You know, the kind of show that would make you laugh with every line they say- like F.R.I.E.N.D.S. or Will & Grace. Sadly, despite the show's effort, Glee comes out to be smugly satisfied by it's own genius before a single episode was shown. No matter how hard it tries, it still comes off as a show that looks average when compared to it's contemporaries, such as the infinitely more enjoyable (and funny) Modern Family, or the genuinely kooky Community. These are matters of taste with which people are allowed to disagree, and clearly do. That it's a smug, G-rated Election on uppers with 2-D characterizations would not, in itself, prompt anything more dramatic than a Tivo thumbs-down.

The Lame Cast Of Glee

Moreover, Glee has managed to produce the lamest characters on TV. This is the problem with a supposedly "feel-good" TV series. I can barely tell each character apart. They all seem to coagulate into a generic ball of musical fluff. They're all lazy characterizations: a jock, some cheerleaders, a swotty girl, someone who keeps cleaning her hands, a guy in a wheelchair who's typically self-effacing, and a gay guy who is camp as Christmas and obsessed with fashion and shopping and y'know gay things like that. I'm genuinely surprised to reach the end of each episode without him yelling "I'm free" as some hunky football player waltzes by. Yes, everyone's a cardboard cliche - it's supposed to be "playing with" stock types - but I think things get nefarious where the dames are concerned. We've got Shrewish, Lying Wife; Sweet Perky Neurotic; Bitchy Cheerleader; Tracy Flick-esque Nerd; Strong Black Woman. Sure, Lynch's over-the-top psycho-coach is watchable, but only because she is, not because there's any more nuance to her. And all of whom orbit around Main Guy, who is apparently perfect, and a saint. Also saintly: football QB. Both are being manipulated by women in their lives while worshipful Perfect Women wait in the wings to ease their burdens.

 

Nearly everyone I know likes it- and I mean nearly everyone. Your sister might like it. Your boss, the bus driver- even your mom. I'm surprised the political parties haven't jumped aboard the already crowded bandwagon. Fans even have a name for themselves- Gleeks (Ugh! How lame can you get???!!!) I mean really? You call yourselves Gleeks? Never has my faith in humanity been so shaken. Seriously- I wouldn't mind it if it were any good but this takes the cake! There's absolutely no buying in to it- unless you count the astronomical sales of the albums that accompanies the series. I mean really, that's all they ever had going. 

The endless marketing. It's almost impossible to spend a day without being subjected to a promotional campaign that's had all the subtlety of a televised hen night.

Glee- Stop Believin'

I actually assumed that given the publicity and the talent (if these cat ever has any talent) the performances they show on the series would be somewhat spectacular- guess again. Majority of the cast were chosen for their musical telents rather than their acting credentials; yet every song is OVERPRODUCED to a level that makes the Vengaboys look like a catchy A Capella group! It's like a rubbish version of High School Musical – which I wouldn't mind were it not for the pretence of drama that precedes every whimsically sung version of an eighties power ballad. At least High School Musical produced and sang their own original songs- I'd give them that. Glee is just remaking every song that was ever sang over the past decades to the present. if they can sing as well as they claim to be, they should at least have a song  or two that were originally written and produced by them. Oh and please, the issues surrounding the lame storylines? Will Mr Schu get with the OCD lady? Will the cool kids accept the glee club nerds? Will we ever care about the type of angst that can be easily communicated through interpretive dance? Sadly, I suspect not.

There, I said it. I hate Glee and some people think I'm a bad person. I think there should be a support group for people who have watched every single episode and still can’t stand the show.  It’s not so much that I hated it from the beginning; I rarely watch twelve or thirteen episodes of a show that I hate.  It’s more of a long-term development over the past few months…something that has come into fruition as the show has declined.  Maybe “declined” is too harsh a word – perhaps failed to live up to its potential?

Glee pretends to be more than just a feel-good TV show, but in it's own way I find lame, boring and humorless- and the more so because it pretends to care.